Everything I Know About SharePoint I Learned In Kindergarten – pt3
We had it rough in our day. Kindergarten was the beginning of the end–innocence lost.
It’s either Law & Order or the Wild Wild West, you can’t have it both ways.
In Alabama, during the Fall of ‘78, Miss Brown, my teacher, was engaged to marry Mr. Green. Miss Brown would turn into Mrs. Green, in the Spring–that wasn’t funny to me until much later.
Mr. Green’s courtship ritual began each day at recess when he would bring his fiance fried chicken from the chain restaurant he co-managed. Their deeply longing looks and whispered tenderness among the intoxicating aroma of batter-dipped poultry often insulated them from the WWF-styled main event near the monkey bars.
When Miss Brown was attended by Mr. Green, we knew we could act like Lord of the Flies rejects and no one would care. One afternoon, during Round 3 of the Battle Royale, Lamar and Brian held me down while Christian sat on my chest. Out of breath, unable to scream or move my limbs, I defended myself the only way I could–I bit Christian on the buttocks.
Christian, howling in pain, erupted from the fracas and ran to the park bench Mr. Green and Miss Brown occupied. Miss Brown’s reluctance to hear anything other than Mr. Green’s sweet nothings afforded me time to find a place next to Christian as he sobbed through his accusations.
“We’re not animals, Paul. We don’t bite.” Miss Brown informed me sternly.
I suppressed my sarcastic urge to contradict her notion, humans are indeed animals. We learned as much in our Science lessons. More to the point, we acted like complete savages daily, she just chose not to notice. “He sat on me!” I exclaimed.
Miss Brown ended any further discussion of the matter, “You can explain it to the principal after recess.”
Christian and I were both paddled after recess. I was growing more accustomed to the prescription beatings by now. I washed the tears and dust from my face while Christian puked in the urinal. He didn’t flush it, maybe out of spite.
Christian and his little gang were happy in the Wild Wild West–the one Miss Brown unwittingly created–until he wanted justice. Like the plot of many Westerns, Miss Brown’s justice was swift and cruel as she brought order to our lawlessness.
Don’t let your SharePoint site bite you in the ass. Set clear boundries and expectations between Law & Order and the Wild Wild West, you can’t have it both ways in the same site collection. Then watch how the users interact with the site and each other.
